Interview Featuring Coach Effy Blue on her Major Life Transitions
“I have come to accept myself as being in a constant state of work-in-progress.”
Dom: Tell us about your transition in a couple of sentences:
Effy: I have had two major transitions in my life. One was to leave a well paid, high status corporate career to start my own business. The other major transition was to get off the relationships escalator and explore a non-monogamous design for my romantic connections.
Dom: How did you know it was time for a change?
Effy: My career transition was slow and painful. I became disillusioned by the sector I was working in. I was deeply depressed but I was enduring it and pushing through most of the days. I wasn’t dealing with my stress at all. Then I started to carry around this very visceral feeling that I was going to turn inside out any second. It was terrifying. I think it was the embodiment of the misalignment between who I was and what I was doing.
Dom: What kept you going when you doubted yourself?
Effy: I was very fortunate to find a therapist who was very supportive right when I was at the depths of my despair. I trusted myself intellectually and I knew I was capable of doing what I wanted to do but I was emotionally in a dark place. I knew if I could get myself to my desk and turned on my laptop, I could make progress but there were days where I couldn’t get out of bed. I didn’t think I was ever going to My therapist was incredible at helping me separate myself from my depression and process it
Dom: How long did it take you to fully own your new identity?
Effy: It took me two years to admit that I am struggling beyond reason, initiate a change and figure out my new path. I have come to accept myself as being in a constant state of work-in-progress. For a perfectionist, this is really hard. I try not to think about owning my new identity but instead to remain curious to what comes up for me and stay true to that.
Dom: What are you most proud of?
Effy: I slammed on the breaks, tore my life apart and pieced it back together again. It was a brave move. I am proud of my courage to do that.
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